I’ve always been excited and proud and uncertain by this entrepreneurial journey, of building a business. Not relying on an employer. I’m putting my own self ‘out there.’ Although, I’m establishing an online presence with social media, and marketing my life coaching services for women in affairs, face-to-face introductions are kinda awkward.
Initially, I just introduced myself a life coach. No big deal. And I didn’t offer more information. The conversation would move on.
I wasn’t being fully genuine though, and it certainly wasn’t helping my business.
After several months in, I began to pay more attention (with the help of my life coach) to my uneasiness during those initial introductions, with people I knew and strangers.
Revelation: I was still in shame, and I didn’t want to be judged for helping the other woman. No one likes her. No one sees her humanity.
I worked to manage my shame.
However, the introductions are still awkward, sometimes. After I say, ‘I offer life coach services for women in affairs,’ and pause, I receive one of three different reactions:
- The pursed lips with a long gaze, then a short, curt reply, and quickly changing the subject
- The half-smile, sheepish look, and a slight chuckle, looking away as they ask a follow-up question
- The wide-eyed, ‘ohhhhh,’ leaning in to know more
Now, I’m curious. What’s going on?
Without knowing someone’s past or present story, of course, I’m assigning my own narratives to their responses.
Person 1 – the wife/partner
Person 2 – the ‘other woman’
Person 3 – Not directly impacted by an affair
I wonder, is my introduction triggering shame and/or unresolved emotions in the person I’m talking with?
Back to my life coach I go, and to researching other entrepreneurs that had to navigate difficult interpersonal business moments and their revelations.
My intention is to honor myself and the women I serve AND figure out how to somewhat repair a rupture if my introduction blind-sides someone’s emotional memory. How will I do both?
To cultivate grace?
To be continued.